Comatose [bhu]

[I L Y I C H]

I stood silent in the darkness, shrouded in it as I coveted my thoughts. My aunt had looked to the great black beast as he returned and bowed her head despite her narrowed eyes. I could not find it in me to do so. So easily the man had been removed from them the first time. Lucifer had told me the story, bitter and cold as he was. The man had been so far gone these last few months. Lost to the tidal wave of grief. Gone mentally and weakening physically. As if the removal of his sister and mate had been the removal of his will. Maybe all those myths about soul mates were real. It seemed as such for Lucifer, and his sudden loss of total motivation. It was indeed Lucifer and Lucifer alone who had look at Bidziil today and not bowed. The red shouldered man had given forth a rare show of emotion and let hatred and anger seethe forward. It was obvious that the man blamed Bidziil for his wife's death. Bidziil who had thrown the war that he could have averted so easily. Lucifer didn't understand it, and nor did I.

Nimrod would have fallen before him Bidziil needn't have done anything but attack the loyal beta. Yet he hadn't. He had folded uncertainly at that was no way for any alpha to behave. No way to lead a pack. Settled in the red canyon I couldn't help but feel my doubts. I had bowed along side my Aunt and mentor. Bowed because the great man was still powerful and full of potential, but I could not help doubt. Would Bidziil abandon us again? It seemed to me that the man would forget that the pack was as much his family as the blood relatives. As his precious mate. I would not befall anyone for their loves, such was the way hearts worked, but I couldn't help but be jealous. We were important too. Our thoughts and opinions and hopes and dreams mattered too.

Bidziil needed to remain here. To lead us as he was made to do. Maybe not for the humans. Just for us. Because we damn well needed him, and we didn't need his uncertainty. Not again. Glaring at my dirty paws I remained silent. Waiting for the clouds to drift across the last of the stars so the world might be completely dark. Might as well go for a hunt. It was always calming. To focus my mind on something I knew and not something I speculated on. I for one wanted to know everything, and it was what revulsed me the most about 'personal relationships'. How was I meant to understand Bidziil as a person without any lies? I couldn't. And it worried me greatly. So I would do what I was created to do, and follow some feline into the wilds were I could eat and ponder alone. I knew myself, after all. That was something I could always understand.

[Bhu ♥ Irwin]

Word had it my sister had joined Vea Apxn. I had overheard her unusual name when Bidziil Alpha--seriously, Nimrod, Bidziil himself said we could call him by his name, was whacking me over the head really necessary?-- was telling his second in command the new recruits Vea Apxn had. I was hurt more than surprised by my sisters disloyalty. She had always held a certain fondness for felines, but did she really value them over being with me? I blinked once as I ventured further from camp, deciding that she must not know I lived in this pack. That had to be it. Midge and I were truly the best of friends.

Speaking of best friends, my eyes shifted over to Moran, whom seemed to be distractedly stalking, perhaps off to hunt. Tongue lolling, I galloped over to the tawny boy, skidding in front of him and licking him on the forehead in greeting. There was no awkwardness in my gate, Moran should know by now my need for physical contact. Stationed in front of him, I sat down and blocked his way. “Hey, Moran! Where you off to? Hunting? Can I go?” I pursed my lips in thought for a split second. “Hey, did you notice the look Lucifer gave Bidziil when he returned? I smell some drama!” My eyes glowed in enthusiasm as I watched the boy, wagging my tail in anticipation for anything he had to say.